Wednesday, January 19, 2005
Things we do to our children
You've all met or heard of someone that's done it - maybe it's even you that everyone else knows. Those people that feel the need to come up with a novel name for their child.
Please, please, whatever you do, don't be clever or cute or novel. Stick with the tried and true and do not subject your poor innocent child to years of torment and ridicule because of their name.
Where did this diatribe come from? Of course, I am on pediatrics - where else? (Not that I would ever be known to rant about anything, right??). I'm currently on my inpatient pediatrics rotation at the local children's hospital. The doctors with which I am working have made a list of the strangest names they have come across. Of course, almost everyday we've had a discussion about this list of names and the possible reasons parents might have for dooming their children for decades to come.
And the list includes:
1. Sunshine
2. Rusty Lance (I can't even comment on this one.. hopefully the kid will enter a monastery before the age of 3)
3. Nucleus (always has to be the center of attention)
4. Tyberius
5. Tomango (mom's name was tomato, dad's was mango - just kidding)
6. Bam Bam (Flintstone kids, 10 million strong and growing!!)
7. Serenity Faith
8. Divinity Trinity
9. Celestia Unique
10. Abid Nagi
11. Seven (hopefully not named in sequential order)
12. Shanequeneshea (nothing to say, but WTF?)
13. Yovanka
14. Treylon Omega
15. Ebony Queenette
16. Patriarche
17. Temia
18. Genesis
19. Dkayla
20. Neveah (heaven spelled backwards)
21. Melvinisha
22. Dasani (always reminded to drink their 8 ounces of water a day)
23. Keyarra
24. Bronshay
25. Rastus
26. Quanshave
27. J'tavion
28. Female (fem-mall-ee
29. Pajama (paw-je-ma)
30. Shithead (pronounced shitheed)
31. Abcd (pronounced ab-see-dee)
See what I mean? What are these people thinking? Naming your kid after a bottle of water? Puh-leeze.
May I please, please, please, please, please admonish you to stick with the tried and true names and don't be cute or clever. Your child will thank you forever.
Also, if you know of a good reason why a parent would do this to a child, please let me know. I am almost dying to learn the reason for this travesty.
BTW, family names are not included here, although some family names are quite unfortunate. Family pressures are often much stronger than you would believe.
more to come ¶ 5:24 AM
Please, please, whatever you do, don't be clever or cute or novel. Stick with the tried and true and do not subject your poor innocent child to years of torment and ridicule because of their name.
Where did this diatribe come from? Of course, I am on pediatrics - where else? (Not that I would ever be known to rant about anything, right??). I'm currently on my inpatient pediatrics rotation at the local children's hospital. The doctors with which I am working have made a list of the strangest names they have come across. Of course, almost everyday we've had a discussion about this list of names and the possible reasons parents might have for dooming their children for decades to come.
And the list includes:
1. Sunshine
2. Rusty Lance (I can't even comment on this one.. hopefully the kid will enter a monastery before the age of 3)
3. Nucleus (always has to be the center of attention)
4. Tyberius
5. Tomango (mom's name was tomato, dad's was mango - just kidding)
6. Bam Bam (Flintstone kids, 10 million strong and growing!!)
7. Serenity Faith
8. Divinity Trinity
9. Celestia Unique
10. Abid Nagi
11. Seven (hopefully not named in sequential order)
12. Shanequeneshea (nothing to say, but WTF?)
13. Yovanka
14. Treylon Omega
15. Ebony Queenette
16. Patriarche
17. Temia
18. Genesis
19. Dkayla
20. Neveah (heaven spelled backwards)
21. Melvinisha
22. Dasani (always reminded to drink their 8 ounces of water a day)
23. Keyarra
24. Bronshay
25. Rastus
26. Quanshave
27. J'tavion
28. Female (fem-mall-ee
29. Pajama (paw-je-ma)
30. Shithead (pronounced shitheed)
31. Abcd (pronounced ab-see-dee)
See what I mean? What are these people thinking? Naming your kid after a bottle of water? Puh-leeze.
May I please, please, please, please, please admonish you to stick with the tried and true names and don't be cute or clever. Your child will thank you forever.
Also, if you know of a good reason why a parent would do this to a child, please let me know. I am almost dying to learn the reason for this travesty.
BTW, family names are not included here, although some family names are quite unfortunate. Family pressures are often much stronger than you would believe.
more to come ¶ 5:24 AM
